Monday, 22 December, 2008

Only time will tell

A lot has been happening in my life recently, as funny as it may sound the market crash has affected by my acads, professional life, my love life and my overall peace of mind.
There was a well laid path before me one year back from now:
1. do this
2. then do that
3. then you will get this
4. you will be happy with it.

But suddenly everything seems hay-wire now. Point one itself is not certain, leave aside the other three. Have been wrecking my head a lot over all these issues since last few days and finally realized that there is very little I can do to change things. In fact there is very little anyone can do at this point of time. Time aaahhh... thats the key thing here. Only time can change things, as it will pass on slowly things should fall back in place. May be I will have a better plan, a new improved deluxe version. Like how the Christmas offers are always better the diwali offers.
But as depressing as it may sound, there is no certainty now and all i can do is wait it out and try and keep my sanity intact till then.


just another trainer kit, this one checks your patience and faith in fate :D

Monday, 24 November, 2008

A change of season...

As my internship is coming to an end I couldn't help but notice so much is going to change around me in the next few days... to begin with I changed my playlist. These 120 odd songs have been companion throughout my stay in Bangalore, since there was no other source of media.It was mixed blend with all the genres from chut Hip-Hop to O Palanhaare. But like everything else even this has to go as they have been taken over by 1.5 GB of happy music from Charlie. The waking up every morning to wait for VVP will be taken over the sleeping till 12 in the insti rooms. Routine testing work will be replaced by routine vellapanti which is always most welcome. But change is hardly pleasant... The freedom I have enjoyed in Bangalore is unlike I have experienced either back home or in Goa. There was a sense of responsibility along with the privilege of freedom. Tasted for the first time in my life exactly how difficult to spend your own hard earned money. Learned how a loner can help another loner to not be alone anymore.

But change is important, like the playlist. It undoubtedly contained my most favorite songs, still it was getting on my nerves. Familiarity breeds contempt you know. Just as the songs were changed the whole setup around me has to be changed. For many one pleasant change might be that I will stop blogging coz there won't be net facilities back in Goa. There will be new people to meet (I hope the 2008 batch has some delicious candy), new friends to make. And new things to learn

Thursday, 20 November, 2008

Things I have learnt bcoz of PS2

Here is the list of things I have learn during my 5 month long stay in Bangalore.

1. Do not hesitate to start a conversation with a complete stranger, it helps to know people. Dump the conversation if the person is a dooche-bag.

2. Try to get a ride to office, buses in Bangalore suck ass.

3. Do not mess with the cafeteria guys, he is your "annadaata" while u r at PS.

4. Keep in touch with the randomly made new friends, if they r employed and well to do, u might get a free lunch/dinner :P. \marwadi/

5. If you do not have work , read up for placements or just for the sake of knowledge. Wiki can be much more usfull than u imagine.

6.Make Linkidin Contacts.

7. Do not add colleagues on Gtalk, coz yur status messages will be mostly abt how bad yur ps station is.

8. Bit of free stationary is not going to hurt anyone.

9. The quality of eye candy in Bangalore is really really good, I hope u have a sweet tooth. I do :D

10. Visit Java City(Church Street), Indian Coffee House(MG road), and A2B(CMH rd), ISKON before you leave Bangalore.

11. The maid will not come everyday, even if u paid her well. So make sure you have extras.

12. Land-lords are bastards/bitches.....

13.Money saved is money earned.

14. Go to expensive cafes only if u r with a chick, otherwise u r just a retard.
I was i know .. i know..

15.Meet more and more people everyday.. make new friends and never regret.

16. After all thsi if u still have time, wotk on yur PS project

Thursday, 13 November, 2008

Another anology...

CPU time or CPU usage is the amount of time a computer program uses in processing central processing unit (CPU) instructions, as opposed for example to waiting for input/output operations. The CPU time is often measured in clock ticks or in percentage of the capacity. It is used as a point of comparison for CPU usage of a program. Each program tries to get as much processing time possible to get it's work done and free itself from it's responsibilities. Then there are the evil programs which try to grab all the processing power and slow down your system. At any instant of time if one sits down and takes a careful look, he/she will realise that there are a bunch of unnecessary programs running in the back ground slowing down the system. If you carefully analyze most of these processes are not required for sustenance of the system and most of the work can be done without them as well.
Still they are run in the background, just hoping to be used someday, by some random thread or process. I have been doing a lot of CPU load testing down at my company in PS, and each thing you add to your OS slows you down, each extra unused module/ driver slows it down. A good system always decides what is best for itself and then prioritises as required.

Now people don't beat me up for my yet another weird analogy, I hope that you will be able to share my insight in to this little idea. Everything we do in life makes us think (well not dope and hash coz that is supposed to not let you think), it occupies a small part of our brain , it may be running in our mind all day long or in sudden bursts. Some of these thoughts which keep you occupied are just pure evil , coz they pull you down. Some of these can be

Guilt : Oh I should have give my best shot, why did I hold back. I shouldn't have said that, jack ass I am.

Hate: How could he say/do something like that, bloody %&^%*()^)&(_*_

Overburden : I need to get a six pack and do well in exams, get placed, get a girl, be a good person, help the poor, go to temple.

Worry : Will I get a good university? Will I get placed? Will my paper get published? Will she say YES ? Is mess gonna suck today as well?

Then there are the good thoughts like :

Eagerness : When you takes pains and plan something for a friend.

Satisfaction : Your 2000 line code finally is debugged after countless hours of labour and it gives a small cute little output as expected and your face is lit all day long. Mess worker let you have an extra sweet at lunch today.

The idea here is that there are some nasty things in life about which nothing can be done either because it's too late or it isn't within your scope to begin with. So what's the point worrying about them. If something is not in your hand that prolly praying will help but worrying about it will certainly not help and moreover it will occupy your mind all the time.
If there is guilt because of a mistake; then learn from it ; move on and forget it. Hate LOL, it's the funniest thing I have come across.
Coz the it ruins the person who hates and hated is happily enjoying his/her life.
Here you are hating another person, and spoiling you own mood and the other person is simply enjoying his/her life, prolly getting laid or having the time of their lives.
Don't pull yourself down by adding extra unnecessary responsibilities, sit-down, decide wat you want and then give a full shot at it, no holding back then.

Bottom line
_______________ hehehe

Don't worry, it will only make u mad and probably degrade your processing power,
instead prioritize and enjoy.

PS: No Trainer kit here. lemme know if u can fit a kit here as well

Sunday, 9 November, 2008

Brand name can only take you so far..

Whole of last week I have been doing shopping, at least a lot of window shopping. I have been to malls as well as road side shops, seen Reebok to Rebook(spoof brands). As a consumer the only thing that concerned me was the quality of the product I am buying. Though at times one tends to get biased by the brand name, what matters in the end is the quality and functionality. If the product is good enough you don't mind shelling out a few extra bucks. There are times when we do get ripped of in the name of a brand. What also holds true is that a non branded product can also be pretty good and worth every penny.

It's my favorite past time to develop analogy between situation which are miles apart. In the past I have compared electronics experiment setups in the lab to problems we face in real life, I know it's geeky.. but I am a geek bloke \m/. This post is one more classic example of how a simple idea can picked up from one place and put in another more complicated plot to help us get a better picture and understanding of the whole scenario.

I am student of the second batch of BITS, Pilani, Goa Campus. And here I stand without no regrets whatsoever. When I joined BITS I knew it was a new college and was very well aware of it's consequences. There were no expectations other than that of quality engineering education. There has been a lot of buzz among final year students about placements. Despite our best efforts to contact companies and foster awareness about our new and vibrant campus among the recruiters there hasn't been much response. Students like myself and many of batch mates who have put there heart and soul in what they like have been met with disappointment because their dream companies have not come for placements. All those long hours spent in the lab or on the streets of Mumbai looking for small components, while your friends were sleeping in their rooms or playing some computer games seem to be a waste now. Ones tends to think that after all these efforts, we all will end up in a BUS like the rest of the lazy bums who had fun and didn't do much all these years. We start blaming the officials responsible for not taking the required initiative to promote the campus.
The whole scene seems depressing and hope seems to be lost.

Let me give you another perspective of the whole situation, an approach from the employers point of view. He is no different from us. He is also a shopper out in the market to buy (... yes I said BUY) fresh new engineers. From his years of experience he has a blind trust in the famous brands like IITs, BITSes, NITs etc. But deep down inside even he is looking for talent(quality). He is looking for people who can take up the job at hand, make profit for his company. I agree that if one has the backing of brand then it's easier to get noticed by big companies. But if you have a brand tag attached to your collar, it doesn't give you the liberty to take things for granted, coz a a poor quality branded product never sells.

All of us here at BITSg had assumed that we have a good brand tag pinned to our collars and now that we have realized that it's not the case, we should not be disappointed, instead we have to improves ourselves to match up to the standards the buyer is expecting. Many of us have seen here at PS2 that ones inside a company it hardly matters whether you are from BITS or a a local college. All that matters is your competence in finishing the job at hand. So if think you have it in you, hang in their lads, some recruiter who realizes your potential will pick you up sooner or later. Hard work never goes waste, it's just a matter of time. Hold one to your passion, it's tronics for me, it may be mech for someone else.

Tuesday, 4 November, 2008

It is all in the mind

There are a lot of goals we want to achieve in life. Lot of of kutti-kutti (small-small) things you wanna do as you move ahead. Each time when you think of a certain task, there are two voices in your head. One enumerates all the reason why the job at hand can be done, why you should take up this new challenge, and how this will help you in a certain way, may be academic of otherwise. But there is also another nasty bugger who keeps shouting why the job can't be done. Moreover it even tells you why the effort will be futile and why u r not capable enough to do it. I would like to elaborate more with a personal experience. I am sure most of my colleagues would be able to relate to this example, since it is something many of you must have come across your-selves.

Soon after my PS2 started I realised that I was gonna have a lot of free time here and that I should put it to some good use so that this 6 month long paid vacation does not go waste. Many of my friends were preparing for CAT 2008 so I decided that I will also give a shot at belling the CAT. I bought a couple of books, joined mock CAT and filled up the form. In all I spent 3.2k for this new sudden urge to give CAT. My mind had quickly sorted out the benefits of preparing for CAT, some of the most obvious ones were:

1. The Apti Qs will help for Campus Interview.
2. Since JEE I had not given a exam which really tests your analytical skills, most of the xams in college are straight forward and there is not much thinking involved, So it will nice way to get some mental exercise
3. Will be a good practise if at all I intent to do MBA in the future.
4. Something to keep my self busy since I had didn't have access to hardware for electronics projects and all.

I did in fact give first 3 mock tests which a percentile performance of 90, 70 and 50 respectively. I know its funny my performance went down the hill whereas people tend to generally improve with time.

Soon the bugger in mind started giving me reasons why the attempt for CAT was futile...
1.The test is on Sunday morning, Come on everyone deserves a good sleep on Sundays, after the weeks hard work.
2.IIMs do not prefer freshers.
3.I am not gonna get in so whats the point ?
4.I am lazy I am loving it that way. :D

So here I am two weeks for CAT and not a clue as to what is gonna happen on the D day. I have become complacent with the fact the this CAT exam is just a time pass for me and nothing more. What was CAT for me could be joining the GYM or learning a new skill for others.

When I had decided to give CAT I had many reasons why it will be useful, but as time passed on the I lost focus and started concentrating on why it was a waste of time and energy (money :) was already gone).

Always think the whole thing through before you make up your mind, do not make commitments you can't keep. Once when you are sure that what you r pursuing is correct then never-ever. Apart from that nasty bugger inside your head there will be others telling you why you will fail, just ignore them, believe in yourself and more importantly believe in the decisions you have taken and show your mettle by honoring them.

Here is my 3 k lost and a new lesson learned. Just another lab session with the trainer kit.

Wednesday, 29 October, 2008

"sirf vicharon ki ladai hai yeh..."

"sirf vicharon ki ladai hai yeh..."
-some panditji

People who know me also know that I am a person who avoids fighting be it verbal or physical. I will make my point once or at max twice and if the opposing party is not convinced then generally the argument is stopped there as I easily back off without much resistance. I have always been this way. I always believed that speak where your words mean something, I know that I if at all I try to make a point it will be correct and precise. So no point giving my worthy advice to a bunch of nut-jobs.

Contrary to whatever I sincerely believed recently I have been doing a lot of fighting. Many a times I was provoked into saying things which are never meant to be said to your near and dear ones. No matter what kinda relation you share with a person, it may be friendship or love or a family tie one things always holds true. It only take one slip of tongue to ruin it all.

"Words are like bullets.."
- some midget from South Park

We all have to admit that the chemical factory upstairs i.e. our BRAIN, does churn out a lot of ugly thoughts specially when your are in a fight with someone, but then usually the logical part of the brain takes over and prevents you from saying those ugly things. One keeps his cool, calms down and then realizes what damage could have been done if that self control had not acted at the right moment. Then again things don't always go as planned.
I have said things to my parents, my friends, my love and some dear ones which I am not proud of. Whenever possible I try and go back to them, apologize for it , sit down with them and talk it over. Try and explain what provoked me into saying such a thing. But then again there are times when its better to leave things the way they are, for the simple reason that I am afraid that when I sit down to talk I might screw up things further.

All I am trying to say is that words are very powerful and it takes skill and courage to deal with them. Be careful next time when your are in rage.
You might say something you wish you hadn't said.

Sunday, 26 October, 2008

Their disks don' fall, they crash around me.

Recently I had given my laptop for a complete make over at the local Sony Vaio Service Center. As a prerequisite for the repair I had to back-up all the data on my external hard-drive, which is pretty old and which I knew might give up any day.

The back-up essentially contained all the info on my academic projects from second and third year at BITS, some of my favorite movies, e-books, music and most prized possessions of all my pics from first, second and third year. Semester 3-2 has been a particularly wonderful semester at BITS. There were a lot of memories attached to those special times which were dear to me and it hurt to see them all disappear as my hard-disk crashed all of a sudden. If only I had created a back-up before hand.
But then again looking at the bright side of things (I blatantly call my self an OPTIMIST you know), now that I do not have those pictures I will not end up browsing through those pics and feeling low about what I have lost. Memories are what we all hold on too during tough times and when these little droplets of joy are taken away, one tends to feel helpless and all alone.
Then again you can think of it as a chance to to move on, make new memories and grow stronger in life getting more and more trained. After all it was just another lab session with the trainer kit. :D

Wednesday, 22 October, 2008

Trainer Kit (not the ones found in the lab)

We often seem to judge other people and compare our situations with them.
" Look at that care free bugger, free lad he is. not a care in the world for him."
Such comments are genreally accompanied by lack of empathy as well as information.

If we have things our way so easy in life there would be nothing to look forward to, Since there will be no challenges, there will be no character building if everything we desire is served to us on a platter. This is not not about achiving certain goals in life or being successful (Society has laid certain standards u know).

Sometimes we face situations which wish we didn't have to face. We tend to ask questions like " why me? wtf did i do ...?"
But the important point to realise is that all of us will be laden with difficulties sooner or later in life, some of there problems will be beyond our problem solving capacity. It's then that your true character will be put to test. In such a situation one can panic and curse OR one can hold ones cool, stay put and continue doing what one feels is right.

That's why I said trainer kit, small issues in life prepare you for the bigger ones which are inevitible. So instead of runnung away, one has to dive into it and continue doing the right thing.

Sunday, 19 October, 2008

New places and new people

As a part of training program at BITS I have been in Bangalore for the last 3-4 months. Leave aside the pains one has to take to settle down in a new city, there a lot of things I have learnt from this Internship. Unlike many of my fellow BITSians I am not going to brag about some sexy-cool project I am doing here, because honestly I am doing none.

It's more about meeting new people and making friends in a new city. When one thinks of Bangalore, the first thing that come to your mind is the Electronic City, the big offices and the IT jobs, the branded shops and the traffic Jams. Well to me Bangalore is more about some people I have befriended here during my course of stay. Some old friends were re-discovered on a different plane and some new ones too.

I am the kidna person who doesn't hesitate to start a conversations at a coffee table with strangers. I have been doing this and have meet countless people, some of them who I still keep in touch with. Sometimes it was an HP professional or an INFY fresher and some person working for a reputed BPO. They all have had a tone which says " welcome to bangalore, feel at home".

All these folks have shared there view on the city and also given plenty of valvuable suggestions on how to survive the fast pace of city.

All I have to say to people is :WELCOME TO BANGALORE AND FEEL AT HOME !!!

Friday, 27 June, 2008

Route No.461

As i mentioned in my previous post, i having doing a lot of traveling this summer using the a/c bus of Route No.461. A couple of incidents happened while traveling between IITb and my pace in Borivli. Both are in no way related to each other but are certainly very funny.

Incident 1:
4 pm Jogeshwari- Versova Link road . Outside IITB main gate.
I got in a pretty vacant bus and saw a lad sitting in the left corner seat of the last row. I thought there is always peace in the last row so I decided to sit in the right corner of the same row. As i moved towards the rear end of the bus , little had i expected what i was about to see. What i saw raised a million doubts in my mind about how teenagers should behave in public. May i remind you once again that the bus was pretty vacant , hardly 4-5 people were there. So as i moved towards the end of the bus a girl rose from the seat next to his.... with her head bent towards his lap!!! i know, i know she might just be resting her head on his lap and taking a nap, may be she was not well. But these are the confessions of a pervert mind and i am sure all u guys know what i was thinking that time. they both stared at me , but by that time i was too close to the last row to turn around and find another seat , so in sat in the right corner of left row, thus raising a awkward situation for all 3 of us. all throughout the journey they kept cuddling and stuff by the time i called up my gf and updated her about this lolmax incident and we both were rofling.

Incident 2:
12:30 pm Western Express Highway, Thakur Village, Kandivali.

Yet another boring journey from borivli to powai had began and just when i was thinking that nothing interesting could ever happen on this route, the bus suddenly stopped, i peeped out to see what bus stop it was, but it was not a stop neither signal. Two people got in the bus, they were in their early twenties and on them was wearing an helmet. I Thought what a douche bag , wearing a helmet in the bus. what ... did he park his bike at the bus stop and then took the bus ? the bus moved on and i assumed they sat peacefully in the bus. But fun was about to begin. Suddenly i heard some guy getting thrashed in the rear end of the bus. the two guys(helmet wale)) where beating up this other guy , abusing him. After a bit more beating up and abusing we understood that the guy in the bus had spat on the 2 bikers. So the were kinda taking revenge... then they took him off the bus and v carried on with our lives happily ever after.

Wednesday, 11 June, 2008

Joy Ride

I was there at the bus stop waiting for my air conditioned bus, route number 461. I have been taking this bus for the past one week ever since monsoon hit the shores of Mumbai. Though bike is my favorite mode of transport, it’s too much of a risk in the rains specially with all the potholes and slippery roads. A very intelligent rickshaw driver once said, “Sahib these poor bikers are cursed for lives. During the summers they have to face the unbearable heat of the sun and as far as the monsoons go … voh to aap dekh hi rahe hain ”. So getting back to route number 461, I had yet another boring day at Power Anser Labs in IIT Mumbai where I have been working as part time MATLAB coder. It was 6 pm now, as I saw each bus approaching I eagerly sliced through the crowded bus stop onto the road to check which bus it was, only to my disappointment it wasn’t 461. Many busses went by and I had lost hope and reaching back home in time. Just then I saw a bus which seemed like an ac bus, as I eagerly leaned forward, to my relief it was 461, I got in to attention mode as I had to get into this one at cost . As it slowly came to a halt I was yet again let down by the packed bus. The driver didn’t even stop the bus. It just went by not even bothering to ask if we would like get in. I was pretty hungry by then so I headed towards a local restaurant to get a cup of tea and some pav-bhaji. I usually tip well, but the arrogance and incompetence of the staff there made me change my mind(I didn’t even leave the two 50 paise coins he got back with the mouth freshener). I was back on the bus stop by 7pm. I finally gave up on the 461 and got in a XXX (don’t know what number It was). This one dropped me close to my place and I had to take a rickshaw from there. I got a seat whew..!, it was the last vacant seat, I heaved a sigh of relief, just as it was sinking in that I will not have to go home standing, I heard a sweet voice ” excuse me, this is the ladies seat”. So I let her have the seat. Same thing happened again, I sat onto another vacant seat and bang in less than 2 minutes came the “excuse me”. So there I was on my way back home in an extremely crowded bus which was moving at a speed on 20 km/hr, in a weird acrobatic posture; the most striking part was that my groin was pushed against the rod attached to the side of the seats. Hooked on to my mp3 player I was maintaining the posture because there was no space to move even a bit. After about half an hour or so, the bus broke down or at least I thought it did, because it had slowed down too much. So I decided to get off the bus and get a rick back home. This is when the joy ride began …

I got a awesome rickshaw driver, the first thing I asked him “auto kahan ki hai bhaiyya”, he said shere-e-punjab”. I know that it’s just another locality in Andheri west but still, Sher-e-punjab sounds very inspiring and powerful. I have this habit of chit-chatting with rickshaw-drivers, taxi drivers, mess workers etc. basically the people who keep our daily lives moving, but nobody ever takes time to either appreciate their efforts or speak politely to them. It was while I was sitting in the rickshaw that I realized how much fun it is to see the world around you when it rains. As the cars sped away from our rick it was fun to see how tiny droplets of water were thrown off the road by their wheels, how the bikes sliced through the pools of water as if cutting a cake. Whenever a truck or bus went by, water was splashed onto the rick, it seemed like the rain was desperately trying to get to us in spite of all our efforts to stay dry. My conversation with the driver continued, he enlightened me on how 2 stroke ricks are better than the 4 stroke ones, how the RTO harasses them to get money.

Slowly moving through the traffic I finally reached home. It was not an eventful evening but it was an evening I enjoyed. The painful bus ride, the tiny droplets of water, the 2 smokers at the bus-stop(forgot to mention that ) , the awesome rickshaw driver and a lot of things I have forgotten coz I am dead tired.

P.S.: I hope you could guess who’s the intelligent rickshaw driver.